Funnily Enough, my Face Helps
I have been loosely applying the rules and consequences for many years, but not so much the fresh start concept. Following these steps makes it very clear and succinct, and has helped me to take the emotion out of dealing with a situation. It helps me to keep my calm, and use the matter-of-fact, few words approach. Now if a student tries to draw me into an argument, I can restate the rule and state what the consequence will be. If the consequence needs to be enacted, I try to ensure that the fresh start step is not forgotten or overlooked, so that the student is able to move on.
This has been very effective – as young students seem relieved that they can start again without you still being mad at them. With little kids who are stuck in the feeling bad/angry about what happened I will often say “Look at my face. I’m not angry. It’s okay – so let’s move on and have a fresh start”. Funnily enough, getting them to look at my calm face helps them understand that they can move on.
